When I was trying to come up with a topic for this blog, I considered doing my own ABC of Christmas, but then I figured Allegra’s would be much more fun.
A is for Angel – Casper, of course.
B is for Breakfast – with pina coladas on Christmas morning.
C is for – well, duh! Work this out yourself. I’ll wait.
D is for Dad – my real Dad, who is missing, presumed dead, somewhere in the Australian outback. Wish I was spending Christmas with him.
E is for Eating – for all her faults, Mom does a great Christmas dinner.
F is for Friends – Happy Holidays Wanda.
G is for Gifts – and they’d better be good ones. My multimillionaire stepfather, Steven, can afford it.
H is for Holly – No, not the green stuff with the red berries. I’m talking about the b*tch who teased me in grade school. Hope she gets everything she deserves this Christmas.
I is for I – it’s all about me.
J is for Jingle Bells – will someone stop playing that song!
K is for Kiss – the one I won’t be getting from Casper
L is for Little Allegra – my niece, who prefers to play with wrapping paper than her presents.
M is for the Mistletoe I’ll be stomping on – it’s no use when my favorite angel isn’t allowed to kiss.
N is for New Year – bring it on.
O is for OMG Casper looks hot in that elf costume.
P is for Parties – but I’m often working Christmas. The paranormal doesn’t do holidays.
Q is for Quick thinking – moving away from the mistletoe when undesirables are around.
R is for Reality Check – get over it people, fighting over gifts is not in the holiday spirit.
S is for Sister – Lily loves Christmas.
T is for Too much information – Steven’s colleague kissing Mom under the mistletoe.
U is for my Usually poised Mom kneeing him in the groin.
V is for Very drunk, which is the only way to endure Mom’s Christmas parties.
W is for wish – if Casper turns up gift-wrapped under my tree I’ll be a happy camper.
X is for Xmgrz – a swearword in Witch that describes my feelings about Christmas.
Y is for – Why the heck is do we do this every year?
Z is for zzzzzzz – snoozing after a big Christmas dinner.
From Janni Nell: Wishing everyone a joyous and peaceful Holiday Season.
From Allegra Fairweather: bah humbug.