Wednesday, April 20, 2011

Barbarians Do It Doggie Style

Posted by: Joely Sue Burkhart
Please note I'm an avid fan of George RR Martin's Fire and Ice series. I wouldn't miss a second of the new HBO series Game of Thrones that just began this past weekend. I loved it. I loved the series on which it's based. Looking back at my formulative years of writing, I credit Martin and Robert Jordan with giving me the desire to write stories as wonderfully epic and sweeping as theirs.

So while this is a complaint of the series, it's done tongue in cheek.

There was a big stink in the NYT about how all the sex must have been thrown in "as a little something for the ladies, out of a justifiable fear, perhaps, that no woman alive would watch otherwise." Lots of people tweeted and commented and blogged about all the women who love fantasy in general (self included), Martin's series in particular (ditto), and anyway, the criticism that the sex was "thrown in" for HBO audiences is ridiculous to anyone who's actually read the books. (The sex was already there!)


But that's not what I'm riled up about.

I'm simply so offended for barbarians everywhere because of their treatment in this series that I couldn't remain silent. I can't even blame it on HBO, because this dastardly failure to accurately convey barbaric sensuality occurs in the books too.


Seriously, who could possibly believe that barbarians *only* know how to perform sex in the doggie style position?


Of course, I can see the foundational thought process. If they're barbarians, they must be around livestock or wildlife a great deal, so naturally they emulate the creatures about them in their bedchambers. Wait a second, though. Doesn't that mean they should have animal dens instead of tents? Or why not just doze standing up out in the pasture?



In the book, Khal Drogo is seriously befuddled when Daenerys gently proposes that she turn around and face him during their nightly intimacies. Yes, a fourteen-year-old girl comes up with the idea to face each other during sex, but not her much older (and presumably experienced, thanks to all the public affection displayed by the Dothraki) barbarian husband. I guess all those battles he'd won seriously damaged his... Oh, never mind, I won't even go there.


Poor Drogo. I know several barbarian warriors who are laughing at him.


On the other hand, royalty in the Fire and Ice world tend to indulge in incest to keep the bloodlines pure. Maybe it's not so bad being a barbarian!

If you watched Game of Thrones this week, what did you think?

12 comments:

  1. Hi Joely :)
    I loved the Game of Thrones pilot. And I laughed when I heard people complain about the "gratuitous" sex. Obviously they hadn't read the books. That sex is a MAJOR plot point.
    :)
    I'm also looking forward to Daenerys' scurvy brother's comeuppance.
    Thanks for sharing,
    RKCharron
    PS - Isn't it great that HBO already renewed it for a full season two?

    ReplyDelete
  2. RK, me too! I can't wait for his "throne." *laughs* I'm so excited that HBO is even doing the series -- and now another season, so quickly! It's great all around for fantasy lovers and Martin fans. I thought they did a great job sticking to character and the actual books themselves.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I totally fell asleep before the sex part, dang! The Big Guy DVR'd it, tho...

    ReplyDelete
  4. Teri, most of the aforementioned sex happens near the end, and the episode ends with a HUGE event from the first book! "The things I do for love." Ah, I love to hate Jaime!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Love that HBO is doing a fantasy. They do great series. And the NYT's comment about the gratuitous sex being thrown in for the women? Yeah. Cause there's nothing us women find sexier than incest, rape and prostitution. WTF? It actually had me worried they were going to radically depart from the series.

    ReplyDelete
  6. I don't have cable. I did read the series up to the 4th book, then had to let it go because nothing GOOD ever happened to my fav. characters. I'm such a romance and HEA junkie! My daughter watched it, and loved it. HBO does tend to sex things up. Just look at TRUE BLOOD versus the original Sookie Stackhouse series. Just saying. Not that the sex would bother me. I'll wait till the first season comes out on Netflix to watch. Your title had me snorting and chuckling.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Such a funny post. Thanks, Joely :) and I don't even read George RR Martin.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Eleri, me too. I would've watched it just because it was fantasy, even if I wasn't a GRRM fan.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Barbara, you're one book ahead of me (I paused temporarily with the bloody wedding scene at the end of book 3). I plan to wait until all the books are out, and then reread from the beginning.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Barbara: P.S. I've never ready ANYONE as good as GRRM as killing off characters! Even major ones.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Yeah, Joely Sue? What about Nicholas Sparks? I just don't get why he's so successful. It's just soooo disappointing! Real life is difficult enough as it is. I want Happily ever after in my reading material. That's my story, and I'm stickin to it.

    ReplyDelete

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...